Dear Argentina

From the Argentine foreign ministry:

The UK has transformed the Malvinas into the cornerstone of a system of military bases thousands of kilometres from London to control the South Atlantic, inter-oceanic routes, and the approaches to Antarctica.

To the administration of Argentina,

Britain has what it wants and has no reason to go to war with you. You don't want to get your collective bottom handed to you once more and don't want to take the risk that Britain's allies will get involved. More to the point, you know this as well. All this sabre-rattling is a bluff.

So could you please stop ranting about how the British are trying to sap and impurify your precious bodily fluids?

Thanks